Public speaking, for an introvert like myself, was always a no no for me. But now I can do it with ease. Let me share the methods and the process I went through, and how this can work for you too.
* Start off with small groups of very easy people. The easiest people in the world to talk to are preschoolers and the first few grades. They will love you whatever you say, and if you bring along a visual aid or two they will think you are Christmas! Have some sweets to hand out and your talk will go like a house on fire! Doing these "easy people" will start to build up your confidence for bigger challenges later. I started off with very small groups, talking to young kids in grade 3 as a Sunday School teacher.
* Don't worry about butterflies in your stomach just before a talk. This is quite normal. Even famous speakers still have these little twinges. It keeps you alert.
* To become calm before getting up to speak, when there's about 2 or 3 minutes until you have to stand up, take a very deep breath, as much as your lungs can take in. Exhale slowly. Wait a minute and then do it again: deep breath, hold, and exhale slowly. You'll be amazed how much calmer you will feel. Although we don't realize it, when we are tense we tend to take very shallow breaths, with the result that we begin to starve our brains of oxygen, which then makes our anxiety worse. Deep breathing stops this vicious circle of increasing anxiety and restores our calmness.
* Try to make any talk you do beneficial to your audience. The knowledge that you are helping people to be happy or improve their lives or be encouraged is a wonderful motivator to get up there and talk.
* Try and get as much humor into your talk as possible. When people are laughing every so often they are much more likely to pay attention to the serious things you say. Laughing seems to ventilate people's brains and make them able to absorb a lot more data than they would if they were bored. Even highly technical talks about Quantum theory or even cancer research can be helped and brightened up by humor.
* Visual aids are great for two reasons: they take the audience's attention off you, and they become focused on your visual item. Secondly, you are making use of other areas of their brains, which helps them to concentrate on and absorb what you are saying, and they will remember this part of your talk much better than the purely aural delivery. Real live items, like a pumpkin or a flashlight are better visual aids than a picture or a chart.
* If you become nervous in the hours leading up to the talk, focus your mind on the time of the day when you will be back in a safe area, like home, or out of work, and tell yourself eg. " I will be home at 3pm and this whole thing will be over!" Focus on the next pleasant thing after your talk, and you will realize that it is just a temporary, albeit adrenalin pumping, moment! Like your Mom might have said : "It'll soon be better!"
* Do your homework. Research your subject. Make sure you know what you are talking about. Try and get excited about your subject matter, so that some of your enthusiasm will rub off on the audience. Get a fire going in your heart and the people will come and watch you burn!
* Always remember that you are a worthwhile person. Everyone has something to contribute that can help others. Believe in yourself! Don't listen to people that tell you otherwise. You have value. You have worth.
These guidelines I've given you have worked well for me. I've spoken to small groups of kids, small groups of adults, and sometimes large groups of people. I have led courses at work which involved a few days of speaking. For 16 years or so I have led a group of teenagers from all races and cultures, teaching them about making life choices that will benefit them. Now when you consider that I am a shy guy who hates being the center of attention, and ugly to boot, it's amazing that I could get up there and talk at all; yet I did, and I still do, and I enjoy it, because I know that the people I am talking to are being helped and encouraged by what I say.
So don't be scared! It's really not that bad. It's like jumping in a swimming pool.
It's lovely once you're in!
Duncan Kelly
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Tuesday, May 13, 2008
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